I'd been writing a series of letters to my boys that past couple years that I post here on my mom blog. It's been quite a while, so I'm posting this today.
I love you guys. And I'm so glad I'm your mom. And I'm so glad for each day that I get to spend with you. I know I don't always seem happy and excited. I get frustrated when you don't clean your room or when you fight with one of your brothers or when I see a "D" on a report card when I totally know you're capable of better grades or when I have to tell you do take out the garbage four times and then just give up end up doing it myself. It's not an easy job to be a mom, but I love this job. And I know that if I ever lost one of you that I'd give anything to have you with me to tell you to take the garbage out one more time.
I am thankful every day that you are all healthy boys. I know other people with children who aren't healthy. Or who have lost their children way too early in life - to disease, to suicide, to war. And I have you here, all of you. And if I don't make it clear quite often enough how much you mean to me, I do love you with all my heart and am so grateful to be able to see you grow. Please don't forget that.
I was working on an article today for work on a young man who died at 19. It was hard to try and do an interview with a mom who had just lost her 19-year-old son. I have a 19-year-old son. It's just hit too close to home. She talked about all he'd done in his young life. I could feel tears streaming down my face as I didn't show it in my voice over the phone. All I could think was how heartbreaking it would be to lose a child at that age. She didn't seem sad. She seemed proud and talked about happy memories. She seemed confident that her son knew how much she loved him and that she'd made the most of her time with him.
None of us knows when our time will be up. But it is up to us to not waste the time we have been given. We should make sure those we love know that we love them. I feel very loved as a mom to all of you. And I want to make sure you know how cherished you each are just for being you -- for those quirks and characteristics that make you so lovable.