Sunday, July 7, 2019

Dear Sons: Savoring the Firsts Even As You're Growing Up

Dear Sons (letter #30),

There have been many firsts in your lives that I so enjoyed witnessing. The first time you smiled. Roller over. Crawled. Talked. Walked. Went to School.

As you each grow bigger those baby and toddler firsts are long gone. But as you enter your teens there are still many things you're learning and experiencing for the first time. Only thing is...I'm not right there holding you and watching you as it happens. It's one of the hardest things in the world to learn to let go and let you live your own life without me being such a big part of it.

So, when I do still get to be part of it, it's so meaningful and gives me a lot of joy.

And this past week I got to experience a first concert with one of you.

For many people, that first concert is something that really sticks with them. I remember my first concert. I had won tickets on the radio to go to a show in the city. It was at a smaller venue in Chicago that held about 1,000. There wasn't really any seating. It was one of those standing room only shows and it was more like a club. In fact, I think there was a two-drink minimum when you went to the show. And I was only 19.

The act was Travis Tritt, who I really liked. My older sister and brother-in-law met me there. My sister was about six months pregnant at the time. It was a good show and I was definitely hooked. I couldn't wait to go to another concert. The next one was more of a traditional concert at a big venue. It was called World Music Theatre then (it's also been called the Tweeter Center and is now the Hollywood Casino Amphiteahtre) and it was to see Garth Brooks with Martina McBride as the opening act. We had seats on the lawn. My in-laws went with us, a niece and I think my sister.

Your oldest brother and I have been to many concerts together. We enjoy a lot of the same music. He loves 80s bands and country. We've seen Kiss, Toby Keith, Brad Paisley, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Bon Jovi, Kid Rock, Def Leppard and others.

I took your next bro to his first concert last year. He was 19, just like I was. His favorite singer is Phil Collins. I was excited to take him to see another artist from my era for his first concert. He was so into it that he went out and bought a drum set the next week.

Your next bro has yet to go to his first concert. It's not that I haven't tried. Two summers ago I was excited to get tickets to take all five of you to a show. It was a band that you all liked and I was glad we'd all get to have that experience together. It was devastating when we learned of Chester Bennington's suicide just a couple weeks before the concert was to take place. A couple of your brothers were huge fans and took that news really hard. Your brother reminded me that he'd wanted to see Linkin Park once before, but I had told him "no." I wasn't a big fan of the band at the time and I think it was part of a larger music festival that I really didn't want to spend my whole day at. I now really regret it.

I also regret not seeing Prince the last time he performed in Chicago. I really wanted to go, but decided not to. I didn't really want to spend the money on a ticket and I figured I'd see him next time he was in town. He died shortly after.

A couple weeks ago when I saw your two older male cousins, we talked about when I took them to Wrigley Field to see Paul McCartney. They were both teens at the time. I asked Matthew if it was his first concert and he said it was. I'm gonna give myself props here for being the cool aunt. Really, how awesome is that to have your first concert be to see Sir Paul?

So, I was really excited to go to your first concert with you this past weekend to see Billie Eilish. I didn't know any of her songs until the past few days and I still didn't really 'get her' before the show. She was a great performer to see live and I really had a blast. I am glad you did, too. It's one of those memories that you'll look back on way down the road and I'm glad I'll be part of it.